Today I arrived in Vietnam—a new country and place I’ve never been before. What is the quality of awareness in which we meet life? What quality of awareness do we live from—do we only see the reality around us, or do we truly FEEL what is right in front of us?
After travelling all day, we found a vegetarian restaurant in the area where we are staying and as we waited for our food there was a Vietnamese local family sitting at the table in front of us.
There was 3 adults and 3 young children. The children were wanting to have attention from their parents, but the parents were very absent and ignoring the kids—and because they were absent the children started to scream loud and resort to other means to get some attention from their parents. Then the kids came to me and Jonas and wanted to engage with us, because they probably could feel that we were present, available and open.
Then one small child went to fill his glass with water from the big water dispenser, and he was struggling to release the water to flow into his glass, and as he was struggling for many minutes both Jonas and I were aware that he was struggling and when we looked to his parents, they were totally absorbed in talking to each other and had no awareness for their son. It was painful for me to see and witness this.
The child obviously needed help, was struggling, and the parents were totally consumed in themselves. Just a lot of loud talking—mind to mind—and no receptivity, inner stillness, and sensitivity to others around them, and the space in which they were in. Jonas then got up from the table and went to help the little boy get some water in his glass. The parents didn’t even notice. The little boy was grateful and relieved that someone had SEEN and FELT him struggling, and helped him.
What happens if a child is consistently ignored from a young age, over and over again, and has to scream for love or attention? What happens to a child that does not experience being seen or felt from a young age? What are the consequences of growing up with parents that are emotionally absent, numb or dissociated?
We don’t receive the basic love and nourishment that we need to grow into healthy adults. We become conditioned that it’s normal to be ignored, not seen or felt, and that we have to “fight” our way through life in order to get any love, attention or recognition.
Either the parents didn’t care that the little boy was struggling and almost could have pushed the whole 5 gallon water dispenser onto the floor—and possibly hurt himself—or they simply had no awareness, space and presence in themselves to really see and feel what was happening in this moment. And most probably, their own parents probably raised them in the same way, and they didn’t learn themselves what it was like to be deeply attuned to, felt, seen and received deeply.
This brings me to the reflection and contemplation on the topic of awareness and the LACK of awareness. Awareness is light. Awareness is the ability to see, feel and know.
How do we go through life—are we fast and chasing the next thing, always hoping to “get ahead” to the “future”? Are we truly anchored here in the presence of now, fully able to see and feel what is right in front of us? What is the depth of our capacity to feel? Do we feel ourselves in every moment—or do we mainly operate from our mind like machines? Where have we become emotionally numb? Can we feel the absence of feeling within ourselves?
Often if we don’t grow up with at least 1 parent that is emotionally available, open and attuned—a part of our truest and deepest nature and original essence gets buried away, and sometimes we lose the connection to our true self because it wasn’t felt, seen and nourished by those around us from a young age.
It’s like a plant that needs essential nutrients to grow and thrive—our true being / original essence needs love, care, acknowledgement, emotional attunement (not mental understanding!), bonding, and to deeply feel on a somatic level unconditionally loved all the way into our bones.
Many of us did not receive this from our parents—and this is the journey of healing and growing into our wholeness—by giving that original essence / true self within us, the love, care and emotional nourishment it never received before.
This world is so focused on mental understanding, mental intelligence, and rationality—and we have forgotten the most basic nutrients that we need to keep our humanity and true self intact—love, presence, care, attunement, true connection, deep feeling, empathy, sensitivity and emotional intelligence.
When I was on the airplane this morning flying into Vietnam, I felt strong goosebumps and chills in my body when the insight came to me: “The heart of Humanity has been broken.” This is the root cause of so much sickness, division, separation, loneliness, and this age of disconnection and soullessness we are living in. The heart of humanity has been brutally abused—and severely injured.
And this is why I chose to come this earth in this time (more goosebumps now when I write this), and with tears in my eyes, this is my mission. To bring back the heart, to heal the heart, honour the heart of humanity and bring the wholesome love and unity of the undivided heart back into the collective sphere to restore the heart of humanity.
This is the purpose of HEART CENTERED humans on this earth at this time—to collectively heal the brokenness together—and the severe disconnection that has taken place that has severed many humans from their hearts (which is also the seat of our soul) with a collective hypnotism of operating solely from the mind. The purpose of our mind is to be a tool that can be used—we are not meant to live solely from this operating system, and to live without the connection to our heart and body is to render our humanity obsolete.
Machines function and operate—HUMAN BEINGS ARE MEANT TO FEEL AND ATTUNE THEMSELVES TO OTHERS AND THEIR ENVIRONMENT. If we lose our ability to feel, attune and connect we are no different than machines.
Love, Nicole ❤️